The internet is pervasive. The realization hit me as the hotel recorded wakeup call began with the gingle from the windows 95 bootup wav file. Magazine ads begin to look more like web pages. Even staunch conservative bricks and mortor Wall Street Journal (the printed hardcopy version) has abandoned black and white for color tinted table backgrounds.
All posts by cs
outside
Refilling from a fire hydrant off the side of the hiway is a tank/pump contraption (used for shooting a slurry of straw and water as a ground coverbase) This trailer is towed by an old suburban, the contractor employees sitting inside. I observe as I jog past the cigarette smoke wafting from the windows all down. Just as I imagine the inside of this vehicle littered with junk food containers, sweaty mens and dirty smelly ashtrays stationary in the bright late afternoon, a big black dude from inside this hell hollers out, ‘Hey Man! What are you doin’ runin’ in this HOT GOTDAMN SUN for? It’s too dang hot for that! Boy!’ His voice faded out as I gave a little salute and kept cruising but he was likely muttering ‘U white boys is all crazy…u know that don’t ya?’ Odd that I was thinking ‘Here I am enjoying this fresh air, suntan and exercise’ and he’s thinking that he’s the one mo better off. I don’t expect we will be trading places.
bad boys
The passenger was handcuffed. Led by two armed escorts from the Fairfax County PD, I asked what he’d done. ‘Parole violation and he fled Virginia and we caught him in South Carolina… He’s non-violent added the officer.’ Uh huh. Isn’t this the line that the father of the Nebraska mailbox pipe bomber fed the media, today? ‘He’s not dangerous?’ The prisoner walked down the airstairs and glanced at me grinning. Still bound at the wrists he flashed a thumbs up. Looked harmless. Take him away!
road test
Rode the back seat of a Continental sedan. Entry is awkward. Take care that you don’t hook your cheekbone on the door window frame as hips go in upper body leans outward. The experience was familiar. Built on the same platform as the full size Ford it shares maybe 90 percent commonality. Badge engineering. The seats are stuffed and there is a liberal application of plastic wood veneer. And, of course, the Lincoln emblems are prominent but it is a weak attempt at disguise. Warning! It’s still a FORD!
what the?
Location: S’mans science class room
Clue: there’s a cornsnake loose somewhere…
road warrior story
yet another, but since I’m using a West Virginia dialup access I promise to keep the narration short. Our chauffer, with the pen hanging down between the headband of his baseball cap and his temple immediately begins his life story as we leave curbside. Included are ramblings about ex-girlfriends and a ’59 Lincoln sitting in his front yard. He says the car is all original (i’d love to understand his definition of that automotive description) except the ‘mirrors are mis’n and the radio aerial is broke’. I’m more interested in the ’91 FORD sedan taxicap in which we are riding by luck (bad) of the draw. It is a claped-out, rusty million mile beater. The RR door gasket next to me is blown out and there is a draft howling wind keeping the air fresh inside. This is a good thing as I note that the window sw is a mere hole in the armrest and the exhaust is rumbling like the muffler is swiss chesse. I’m am being saved from the noxious poisons. I just pray that the brakes (being applied with his left foot) are in better shape as we descend into south city.
guns ‘n ammo
cockpit protection… The last line of defense is an F16 fighter interceptor that will shoot you down. In light of this unpleasent concept, the pilots’ grassroots effort to arm the crew has gained momentum as of late. A year ago their leader said that ‘pilots can’t be both SKY KING and WYATT EARP all at the same time’, but now he is under pressure to change his mind.
No-way. I can’t think of a single scenario which will allow this to ever happen. There are two methods of implementation, neither of which are any good. The pilot could carry, but this makes him a target. If the bad guy knows he’s packing; they just lay for him in an empty restroom and get his weapon (and uniform and ID while they’re at it) Now you have a gun in the wrong hands INSIDE the supposedly secure terminal area. If a pilot is standing in line at the terminal Starbucks, he can’t / won’t be consistently checking his 6 o’clock for someone trying to jump him. The other option is to mount the pistol(s) on the flight bulkhead – ‘in case of trouble – break glass’ style. The problem with it is that it would be difficult to maintain a chain of custody. An aircraft parked RON is unattended. A gun will eventually go missing. When reported the outcome will mean that the terminal(s) will be evacuated and other aircraft departing or departed recalled or diverted.
There are too many unsolveable loose end concerns. The vision of a pilot settled in during enroute flight and whipping out a six shooter for show n’ tell with the pilot beside him conjures ‘wild wild west’ up front. The customers will NOT want to ride.
lawd of the rings
she who must be obeyed calls it the ‘my boss of u ring’ as she thrusts it up in my face as if it had hypnotic power. not neither, i say. what you showoff there is your very beautiful ‘u my kept woman ring’.
today marks 21 terrific years. happy anniversary baby! cheers!
happy meal
R waiter at the Ruth Chris, a fine upstanding young fellow, introduced himself as Colby. ‘First time at our Steakhous?’ ‘Well it is at this one…’, I lied — embarrassed to admit. (Actually, I’d seen pictures in the inflight magazine ads — but then again I don’t think ‘Colby’ is his real name neither. hah!) They warn that the filet mignot would be served on a 500 degree plate. In other words don’t burn fingers. Important safety tip but wouldn’t such heat scortch the nice white linen table if not set it ablaze? With the bill I noticed the waiter’s thankyouyourwelcome speal included the fact that he was a fulltime college student and earning his own way (he had his violin out at this point). With the bill I could have eaten at the Boston Market for a week! I left him a good tip.
Prediction:
Everyone is going to want this trendy (breezy?) new clothing line. She says it’s from the EURIPIDEEZ collection by dadeo! It’s under strategic market study and evaluation. (not yet available in stores)
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