All posts by cs

fear factor

Just for grins S’man and I play a game of chicken. It’s a free dive challenge off the transom thru the murky waters below. The object is to reach ground zero (and return) grabbing a fistful of the clay like mud from the bottom as proof. The thrill is in the unknown depths where, even with eyes wide, it becomes very dark. More fear and less resolve as you leave the light; in another 8 feet it is blackness. Leaving the relative warmth of the surface therm it is ice cold. The pressure forces some water deeper into your nose and you can smell/taste the tannic acid. You know that you are close. You thrust downward thru the pitch in one last desperate grasp for the objective just as your exhausted lungs and nerves convince you to escape this deathly place.

P.U.

flu_dampner_aftermath.jpg

A critter varmint accidentally died. The ultimate action in the chain of events was that BossOfYouRingGirl, was insulted by the odorific carcass. To reclaim the living room, I was volunteered to extract said item. Whilst standing on my head and squinting so as to avoid getting the remains in my eyes I removed the flu damper and groped for the prize. The thought crossed my mind that anyone else would have hired out this job. I found the remains on the smokeshelf and came up with handfuls of soot, dust, chimney clinkers, and pieces of birds nest. The offender removed, I sealed the thing shut with caulking.

can’t

She phones to say that the S’man doesn’t have to water the potted plants after all. Their plans to sail on a friend’s new Catalina 34 have been cancelled because Bruce can’t make it (illness). She says he’s parked on the couch bummed-out. “Tell Bruce”, if it will make him feel any better, “that I will be happy to substitute for him over on the bay!” (This probably won’t happen) Oh — he’s going to be in a mood all day. She’s in trouble…

R.I.P

(ripped in pieces) The old cover is retired. It lasted just over two seasons before the seams blew out, killed by UV.

The new one has very little cotton content. It will go twice as long. There is a concern about ventilation. The old cover allowed the moisture to escape. Osmosis.

phasers on stun

Thumbing through a discarded Law Enforcement Technology magazine I was treated to a rare view of behind the scenes government and a social commentary. The articles promote police business while using terms and acronyms that won’t look bad in a newspaper or get them in trouble with a jury. The “Stun Gun”, for instance, is now a no-no. Hard words like GUN have negative connotations. Call it an “Electronic Immobilization Device” or better still, an EID. They describe it as a “less-lethal” tool. I suppose that this means that the weapon, (er ah device) still has teeth but it won’t kill (er uh cause the Ventricular standstill human reaction). The probes from a fired (discharged) EID puncture the skin (they call it probe placement) of the perp (subject). The electrical zap (pre determined pulse rate waveform energy) takes over control of skeletal muscular response (takedown). In other words: … muscles contract and relax so violently that the rapid work cycles exhaust the blood sugar and flood with lactic acid… Sweet! The article does offer a few disclaimers warnings like skin redness, welts, or small scabs, bumps which may appear from, what they call “signature or evidence marks”. Oh, BTW, not the fault of the EID but the body’s production of histamine. Sure.

Finally, the magazine is a virtual candy store of devices, tools, and gear. The ads feature thinly disguised items that you might find in mainstream magazines. A Palm Pilot is called an “nHand Citation Solution”. A set of wooden cabinets with drawers loaded into the back of an SUV is billed as a Mobile Command Post. WeatherTech, the company you’ve seen that sells floormats and vehicle accessories offers the WeatherFlector (plastic side window deflector) only in this application they feature a happy officer who can now “hear the evil–see the evil–ARREST the evil”. The message is that these bureaucracies have huge budgets. Business will really stretch reality to get a piece of this action.

way of saying

The lady remarked (pleasantly) that our machine looked old fashioned. I hardly agree but thought now there is a descriptor that you hear seldom used anymore. It’s either ‘retro’ or ‘nostalgic’. Good thing that she didn’t proclaim antiquity.

handyman

Unemployed roofer going from door to door is not deterred by the barking German Shepherd. He wants to clean my gutters but seeing as how he arrived on a kids size bicycle he doesn’t have a ladder with him. He wants to use mine. Lemme see now… If he falls and injures himself… Can you say lawsuit? Can’t do a background check neither. The Utah handyman (guilty or not) has made it tough for his co-horts to find work.

tip

The ad meisters have gone too far. The pesky banner ads are bad enough but lately its the prolific pop up or pop under windows which spawn obtrusively. While anti virus and firewall software is the norm, we must now include ad filtering. I installed AdSubtract Pro and it is terrific. AdSubract blocks cookies and even the highly annoying FLASH animation ads. AdSubtract uses an updateable database (annual fee) to stay ahead of the latest ad hijack gimmicks and tricks.